Legal Advice - Landlord gave me bounced check for security deposit |
- Landlord gave me bounced check for security deposit
- Unit above mine dumps urine on my window
- New job states that all credit card tips we earn “go back to the company”.
- Employer says we wont get paid for extra hour tonight for "falling back"
- Optometrist refused to see me because they think I'm lying about being diabetic. Ontario
- Give a roommate a cookie, and they'll ask you for some milk
- Accident because of missing stop sign (MA)
- Can my boss ask me about my medical conditions?
- [WV] Girlfriend and I toured a mobile home and decided we wanted to rent it. A month later when we signed the lease and paid our deposit, we were taken to a different model home.
- Hired a contractor to turn our half bathroom into a full. They estimated 4-5 weeks for completion. Its coming to the 5th month and its still less than half done. What can we do?
- (CA) My workplace blocked me from making a report to APS
- My apartment has had a leaking roof for nearly 6 months and it has lead to black mold. What should I do? Kentucky
- My name is in a lease but I never personally signed anything myself, am I still required to stay at this house?
- My neighbour is experiencing domestic abuse and I’m scared, but what should I do? (Canada BC)
- I'm in Oregon, roommate isn't paying rent and evictions are being suspended until Feb. 2021. Roommate is trying to kick me out in 30 days with an outstanding balance on the apartment. What are my options?
- Harassment at office by unknown person using a burner app
- Vehicle registration
- Escalating issues with unhinged neighbor
- Nevada DMV - wrong name on license.
- Billing Issues Doctor's Office IL, USA
- Can you force a volunteer to work because of 'expectations'?
- What are my options when the dealership has lost the e-signed contract for a new car?
| Landlord gave me bounced check for security deposit Posted: 31 Oct 2020 07:33 AM PDT I moved out of an apartment back at the end of June. By the end of July I expected to receive my security deposit..I didn't. I called the apartment complex and spoke to them several times which they were always "working on it". Finally one of the leasing managers gave me a number to call corporate as she said that's who deals with the returns. I called "corporate" which came directly to a lady who, again, gave me the runaround. Always making promises to call me right back, which after a few days I had to call her back. I finally received my security deposit early October and promptly deposited it. I now look at my bank statement to find that the check has bounced and I have been charged a fee. What should I do? The security deposit is small (under $200) but I am a single parent and that money would be very helpful. I'm trying to avoid court. Edit: I live in Georgia [link] [comments] |
| Unit above mine dumps urine on my window Posted: 31 Oct 2020 12:24 PM PDT I live in an apartment in Georgia. For a few months now we've heard a strange liquid sound at night. Didn't pay it any mind. 1 day my roommate left their window open and we heard the sound again. Turns out the tenant in the apartment above has been dumping urine every night out of their window which is directly above mine. Upon discovering this I contacted the apartment management. The manager inspected my window and confirmed it was urine. We went upstairs to ask the tenants above us what was going on. They confirmed that they had a new tenant subletting from them in the room. Management told the tenant to tell the subletter to stop or he would eventually evict him. The manager then had maintenance clean the outside of the window. Well a week later the urine dumping hasn't stopped. Actually as of today it's increased. We have 2 separate videos of urine being dumped from the perspective of the bedroom. The 2nd was an escalation. For the 1st time ever, it was dumped during the day. What should we do about this? Management hasn't been as helpful as I hoped they would be. What laws in Georgia are applicable for this bizarre occurrence? [link] [comments] |
| New job states that all credit card tips we earn “go back to the company”. Posted: 31 Oct 2020 12:09 PM PDT Basically what the title says. I just got hired at a bar/arcade and when I asked about pay, I was told I would be making $10 an hour + cash tips. Customers have the option to tip on their credit card (which most people would given the current state) or to drop a tip in the tip jars for us to split. The manager explained that we would not be receiving any of the credit card tips because they would all go back into payroll in order to keep our "high hourly rate" (which in NC, is definitely NOT a high hourly rate). Is this legal? Can they withhold our credit card tips for the company even though we (the employees) clearly earned them? [link] [comments] |
| Employer says we wont get paid for extra hour tonight for "falling back" Posted: 31 Oct 2020 03:18 PM PDT Work place: Kentucky Working overnight and employer said they will not be paying us the extra hour we are working and instead the extra hour will be applied next year during the start of Daylight Savings Time, to not incur OT (if we are even scheduled that day) I'm pretty sure this is illegal..right? Does anyone know how I can convince my employer that this is wrong? Does anyone have a specific article from the DOL that they can find? Thanks. [link] [comments] |
| Optometrist refused to see me because they think I'm lying about being diabetic. Ontario Posted: 31 Oct 2020 02:08 PM PDT I'm a type 2 diabetic, I was diagnosed in my early 20s caused by undiagnosed binge eating disorder. Diabetics in Ontario get free eye exams covered by OHIP. I live in a fairly small town in the northern part of the province and there is one optometrist here, the nearest one is 3 hours away. I moved here just before covid and it was my first appointment with them. When I made the appointment over the phone I said I am diabetic and we went ahead and made the appointment. I got there yesterday for it and they asked my age and birthday and got mad that I'm too young to be a type 2 diabetic and clearly lying for a free exam and banned me from the office, despite me trying to explain. I don't know what to do, there is a tax thing for people up here that have to travel for appointments but if I go to the city I have to quarantine after and I can't afford to miss 2 weeks of work. [link] [comments] |
| Give a roommate a cookie, and they'll ask you for some milk Posted: 31 Oct 2020 09:47 AM PDT I live in a small resort esque mountain town, where there are significant seasonal choices for moving here. In Nevada for legal purposes. I had a roommate apply, and declined other applications, she signed a 9 month lease with the landlord that I am also on. she moved her stuff in immediately but never moved herself in. She complained the extra room smelled, so we had the carpet cleaned. Then 6 weeks in, mid september, she said she's going to travel the world, and via text said " I'll help you find a roommate and make sure you don't miss out on rent" She referred a single person my way, and when I asked her to help clean for showing she flipped out (i have this all in text) about why would SHE have to clean. September is what we call shoulder season here, no one wants to move here between september and december. 2 weeks after she said she would make sure I didn't miss rent, she said she would not be paying october rent and I must use her security deposit. She then disappeared and showed up last night, without warning.I came in and she said she was organizing her stuff to take it and then she was going to Tulum, Mexico for a week. I said alright, great and went to take a shower. When I came out she was gone, took the keys and garage door opener and did NOT remove her stuff. It's a LOT of stuff and makes it very hard to rent out with it there. Given that it's the last day of October, she left for a week, and she took the keys and left the stuff, I'm at my limit of frustration.At this point I'd like to recoup the rent because I keep giving her leeway (cookies) and she just keeps abusing that (asking for milk). What can I do legally? Do I need to contact the landlord or file in small claims court? Not sure how the shared lease works. TL;DR, Roommate signed 9 month lease, stopped paying rent after first month, left all of her stuff, and kept the keys and garage door opener. EDIT: I was so focused on frustration with the rent, I didn't even think about the fact that she's vacationing in MEXICO IN A PANDEMIC. I'm quarantining before seeing my diabetic father and pregnant sister in 2 weeks, and she's going to come back from that right in the middle? [link] [comments] |
| Accident because of missing stop sign (MA) Posted: 31 Oct 2020 08:17 PM PDT I work as a delivery driver in the Greater Boston Area, Massachusetts. Tonight was my first night back after being out two weeks, and I was T-boned while going through an intersection. I, technically, am at fault because the other driver had the right of way, but I wasn't familiar with the particular intersection and my stop sign was missing. His car doesn't have any significant damage (maybe a couple scrapes), but I need to replace a door and a pre-existing spinal injury was aggravated pretty badly from the accident. Is it worth going after the city/state about the missing sign? I took pictures and videos around the intersection. Is there anything I can do or is this all in the hands of my insurance company? [link] [comments] |
| Can my boss ask me about my medical conditions? Posted: 31 Oct 2020 07:52 PM PDT Please advise if this is the wrong subreddit. Long time lurker, first time poster. On mobile. Yada yada Background: I have chronic migraines that I have had for 12 years. They are currently well-controlled, except when the weather changes like it did this week. Thus, I have had a migraine all week. Tonight, my migraine got so bad that I had to skip trick-or-treating with my kids. I messaged my boss just in case I couldn't make it in the morning. I also tried to get my shift covered. She told me to take the day off and rest. I told her I would be there if I could. She told me they would manage. Now my boss wants to know if my migraines are chronic. "Are migraines a condition you get often? Is this a chronic condition? Please let me know." Do I even have to answer that? Is this even legal? I went in all week with a migraine and made it work. For reference, I am a full-time, hourly Baker in the state of California. I have no sick time or paid leave. Thanks in advance! [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 31 Oct 2020 06:46 PM PDT So here's the story. The lease for our current apartment ends on November 30th. Back in early September we were looking at options because we were tired of living in apartments. We had found this one mobile home in a mobile home community that we really liked. It was nice, new, and had some features that we really enjoyed (namely a large, deep bath tub, carpeted bedrooms, and a wonderful entertainment center built into the living room wall.) We told the leasing agent we wanted it and we got started on the paperwork. There was some back and forth for over a month because of "lost" emails and miscommunications. Once we finally got all of the right paperwork in, we were told that she "gave the unit to another couple" because they were moving in sooner (and we weren't going to move in until the first of October.) She assured us that they still had other units and that we had nothing to worry about. We asked if it was the same model and was told "yes, it's one of the new units." Well, fast forward to yesterday. We finally had an appointment set up to pay our deposit and sign our lease. We show up to the leasing office, take care of all of that, pay the agent, and then follow her to the lot the trailer home was on. Immediately I was concerned because when we pulled up to the house it looked different from the one we toured. We got inside and it was obvious that while this unit WAS new, it definitely wasn't the one we were shown. It was still a three bed/two bath unit, but it didn't have the three selling points that sold us on living there - no big tub, no carpet ANYWHERE (it's all hardwood,) and no entertainment center in the living room. Also, I'm almost positive the unit is smaller, too. I feel like they pulled a bait-and-switch. I know I sound stupid for signing a lease and paying a deposit on a place that I didn't see before hand, but because they fucked around and took so long to get us out there to sign the lease we didn't have time to find a new place. We didn't say anything to the agent at the time (nor did she even MENTION the fact that it was a different model.) Honestly, had we initially viewed the unit we are now stuck with, we would NOT have went with it. I'm just really frustrated and not sure if anything can even be done. Also, it's worth noting we're renting from a company and not an individual. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 31 Oct 2020 10:19 AM PDT My 85 year old grandfather's home burned down in a fire earlier this year. He is handicapped and lost a leg after his military service. Since he was coming to live with in Atlanta Georgia, we wanted to turn our half bath into a full bath with wheel chair accessibility. We hired a contractor and got schematics drawn out by a city architect in June. He was supposed to be done in mid/late August. We were told by the contractor that due to COVID the city was taking extra long to approve of inspections/permits. 2-3 weeks go by and we don't hear from them. Then they finally show up mid August to start work after inspections happen. We gave them some slack due to COVID but told them my grandfather would need to move here in September so they need to be done by then we were assured that would happen.... it didn't. Flash forward, grandpa has been living here with us and struggling to move around the house. We originally set up the first floor for him to live in. It has an open floor plan and is easy for him to move around safely. However, because the bathroom has been closed due to construction, we have him living upstairs in the master bedroom. Thankfully he hasn't fallen down the stairs yet but he is prone to falling and the stairs are right outside his room. September passed and they told us again they would be done by the end of September. Didnt happen. They came a few times but kept telling us they had to wait again for inspections/permits. October comes by, they have dug up the cement floor, installed pipes, and wood foundation for the unfinished dry wall. Again they say they are waiting for the last inspection to do the drywall, install the plumbing, do the tiles, glass handicap shower, ceiling, paint, installation, and all. They tell us they will be done for sure this time by October 30. It is now the 31st and they have no written plans for completion. What can we do? Not only is this a ridiculous amount of time for a bathroom but we really need to help my grandpa. He is a very stubborn veteran and tries to do things by himself. He's already fallen in the normal bathroom and we find him sneaking up and down the stairs without telling us. Can we pursue any legal actions, recuperate our payment installations, hire a new company? [link] [comments] |
| (CA) My workplace blocked me from making a report to APS Posted: 31 Oct 2020 03:56 PM PDT I work for a small company in California that works with the elderly population, and because of this I'm a mandated reporter. A couple weeks ago I attempted to make a report with APS about a client because it was my professional opinion that she wasn't being taken care of. When I tried to make the call my boss stopped me and threatened my job if I continued to make the call. I don't think that this was legal but I don't know the laws well enough to know for sure. I've also tried googling this question but I can't find anything relevant. I feel awful about this situation and since then I have been harassed at my job relentlessly. Any advice on anything I could do would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. EDIT I should have given this another read through. I want to specify that I waited till I got home then I made the report. My main concern is do I have any recourse if I face any consequences at my work either due to this incident or something similar? [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 31 Oct 2020 06:19 AM PDT This apartment has been a disaster since I moved in, but the worst part has been that the bedroom roof leaks. I immediately let the landlord know and they assured me it would get fixed. Since then I have reached out many many times through email and phone calls informing them the situation is getting worse and them saying it will get fixed. The wall and ceiling are suffering water damage and black mold is growing. Again, this is in the bedroom, where I sleep! I have googled some of my options and my preference is to refuse paying rent until the problem is fixed. I'm just worried that I don't know what all that in tails and I'm scared to get evicted. I do not want to break this lease, and I would rather not have to pay for a lawyer. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 31 Oct 2020 06:26 PM PDT I moved in with a friend from high school, and I enjoy living with him and his girlfriend but there's some things about the living situation they didn't tell me and so I want to move. My name is on the lease (which is for one year) but I never personally signed anything. Am I still required to stay here for a year (Yankton, SD USA) [link] [comments] |
| My neighbour is experiencing domestic abuse and I’m scared, but what should I do? (Canada BC) Posted: 31 Oct 2020 05:10 PM PDT She is being abused by her son who is a drug addict. He comes to her house to eat/sleep every once and a while and then robs her. Sometimes if she puts up a fight I can hear him beating her. I've called the police 3x (first time because she screamed for help, second time because he was threatening to burn the building down, third time because he attacked her outside) but they've never caught him, he's always gone by the time they get here. The most recent escalation was when the mother was out of town, he brought a very obviously mentally unwell girl here and beat her. Her face was covered in blood and he referred to her as a prostitute. I didn't call the police because I felt like it would end up the same as every other time, he'd be gone by the time they got here and he'd know it was me that called. I feel like I put myself more at risk each time I call. He's here right now and I can hear them cursing at each other, but not hurting each other. The landlord has tried to evict her due to this but the courts denied the eviction again this month. Now the landlord is selling the building and leaving. I unfortunately do not have the option of leaving, because I am below the poverty line and this is the only place I can afford right now, and I've lived here much longer than her. It's my home. How can I legally protect myself? Can I call the police before an escalation between them or do I have to wait until he puts a life in danger each time? Will the police arrest him if the mother doesn't want them to and lies about what happened? Am I stuck living like this until the mother wants him arrested too? [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 31 Oct 2020 12:00 PM PDT As the title says, my roommate got mad that I started asking questions about the money that's not being paid. It's about 8K in debt, soon to be almost 10k. He's trying to get me out in 30 days with a note that isn't dated, signed, or even have my name on it. Ive been paying my rent to him since I moved in and tells me not to worry about it when I get notices from the apartments. The eviction mandate in Oregon right now is keeping people in thier homes. But I don't know about him trying to get me out would be legal. If I leave and get taken off the lease early, will it still be my debt? I'm not the main lease holder. I'm confused. Any help is welcome, thank you. [link] [comments] |
| Harassment at office by unknown person using a burner app Posted: 31 Oct 2020 02:23 PM PDT Female in Georgia (USA) here. One morning while I was at work, I received a long, rambling text message from an out of state number. It contained a bizarre narrative of disgusting, sexually explicit content. Slanderous, racist, and false things were said about me and many female coworkers. Some of it was vaguely threatening and I was called explicit names and insulted. The person even mentioned which car I drive in detail, and the name of a family member (I am a rather private person and few people I work with would have known the family member's name without doing some serious cyberstalking. My social media profiles are locked down tightly and I am not connected to coworkers on them). Alarmed and blindsided, I immediately went to HR. I was told that this has previously happened to other women that work on my floor over the course of the past couple of years. The content of the messages they received was almost identical to what I received, and they were harassed and impersonated on social media (as were their boyfriends and husbands). Apparently not much had been done about it by HR. They told me to simply block the number and go about my business. I was disturbed by this as I interpreted it as stalking and predatory behavior. Apparently the person was using a burner app from which they can anonymously call people from a fake number that cannot be traced. I had no idea that anything like this even existed prior to this. Anyway, the messages continued throughout the workday and only got more vile as the day progressed. I was terrified and contacted HR again, but once again I was told to just block the number (I hadn't in case the person said anything that would reveal their identity). Days later, one of the other women was harassed again in the same manner. We went to more members of management and filed a police report, and HR launched an "investigation." The local police asked if the content of the messages might be true (which was absolutely demeaning and insulting). They went on to eventually meet with us at our office and ask questions. We were told that they couldn't do anything unless direct threats were made and that it wasn't harassment by the book unless we texted the person back asking them to stop and they continued to harass us (we never responded to any of the messages). It's almost certain that the person works with us in our building and on our floor based on the content of the messages. Now, for months, there have been no more incidents but I am very anxious when I am arriving to/leaving the office, entering stairwells, etc. I think the fact that this person hasn't been caught could embolden them to harass more women, or even do something worse than before. HR says there is nothing more that can be done. I have read the fine print on the website of the burner app and it says they will provide identifying information in cases of harassment if the police issue a subpoena, but the local police won't issue one because they don't deem the messages threatening enough, and frankly, don't seem that concerned. I am perplexed as to who it might be because I have never been in conflict with anyone at my job and I am unaware of anyone that would harbor any hostility toward me and the other women. Based on the content of the messages, I believe it's a male with some serious mental issues and predatory tendencies, and that they may have an accomplice (possibly a female). What can I do here? What laws might this person be breaking, and what are the statute of limitations on these crimes? I just want to feel safe at work again and know that my other coworkers are safe, too, and that there is not a psychopath working alongside us who is stalking us. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 31 Oct 2020 06:42 PM PDT So, my car got towed from my friend's community last nights because my registration sticker was expired. I would accept that, except, I paid my registration by the due date, and it never came. The DMV told me I had to wait 30 days before I could file a grievance. I filed the grievance and everything, and it just hasn't come yet. Is there anything I can do to get my money back? I do not know anything I could have done to prevent this. I paid my registration on time, filed the grievance, but due to covid, I couldn't go in person to the DMV, and it's a known issue that the USPS has been delayed and loosing a things. I understand that I needed the sticker, but I can't make the sticker myself and the DMV told me I would be fine because "there's a 30 day grace period". I'm in Florida, if that matters! [link] [comments] |
| Escalating issues with unhinged neighbor Posted: 31 Oct 2020 09:56 AM PDT Okay, sorry this is long, but I'm at my wit's end and looking for advice, and some context is necessary. To start, we are in the United States and my husband and I have been dealing with an escalating neighbor situation. Things have ramped up in the past couple of weeks, and last night took things to far. I'm looking for advice on next steps we can take. Again, I don't want to get into too much detail. This has been an escalating situation since we moved into this house just over a year ago. Things were fine at first, but as time went on, we started to distance ourselves from the neighbor because he was getting overbearing and weird. That said, we didn't feel the need to file any sort of police report against him until this summer, when he screamed at my husband and asked him if he wanted to fight. We did not provoke him, and we called the police immediately to get the incident on record. After that, things went back to normal, but over the past two-ish weeks, things have ramped up quickly. It started with us filing our first noise complaint against him (the amount of noise he was making was rattling the doors of our house and our homes are not connected). The cops came out, told him to quiet down, but then after they left, he started to scream at our house. He also sent me a weird, vaguely threatening text. I went to the actual police station the next day to file a harassment report. I even brought them printed out copies of the texts. I've spoken to several officers since, and many of them have been made aware of the situation. After this incident our neighbor is supposed to be getting fined for his behavior, and we will have a judge-only court date about it in the next few months. While our neighbor is not supposed to talk to us (or else he'll be arrested for witness intimidation), he has now called the police on US twice. The first time, our fire pit was too close to our house, so the fire department just had us put it out, move the fire pit, and told us it was no big deal. Last night seemed a tad more extreme and actually frightened me. My husband and I were spending the evening playing Until Dawn in our TV room, which is on the opposite side of the house from our neighbor. It was probably 8:30 pm-ish, and neither of us had been outside of the house since about 6:30pm. All of a sudden, though, we see what looks like a strobe light through our shutters. I open the shutters to find a cop with a flashlight peering in the window. Then there was a knock on the door. I rushed outside while my husband was getting his shoes on to see what was the matter, as I thought maybe something had happened across the street. Turns out our neighbor called the police to make a domestic violence report. He told the police that he saw a male (my husband) push a female (me) and that the male might have had a gun. This was terrifying to hear because we were inside the whole night in a room with the shutters closed just playing a video game. We don't even own a gun. If the police hadn't already known that we were having issues with the neighbor, I anticipate that the evening could have gone very differently. I'm genuinely frightened now. I don't know if I should report him for making a false report (the police already know our side of the story since we had a long convo with them yesterday evening) or if we should sue him or something. I don't know what we CAN do. This is starting to get insane, and all we want is to be left alone and to live in peace. We have already been told that, because of the state we are in, we cannot get a restraining order since we don't have a personal relationship with him. What can we do? [link] [comments] |
| Nevada DMV - wrong name on license. Posted: 31 Oct 2020 05:04 PM PDT So back in pre covid times I went to get a copy of my license and when it was sent out it had the wrong (and a mans) name on it. Correct address and birthdate and a different license number. I was in the middle of a name change so I just waited to deal with it till I had all my paperwork. I took all my paperwork in to find out that they had closed my old DL record and created this new one. They said I needed to talk to an investigator to get it sorted and that one would call me. No one called, no one returned my calls. So I went in again and was told basically the same thing, they couldn't update my name because my ssn was associated with the closed record, they cant have it on 2 records, and that an investigator would need to sort it out. Still no call and no return call. Third time same thing, only they suggested I get a new name change from the man's name on my card to the desired name and then not have my ssn on my DL record, which means I cant have the type of ID used to travel. Because of covid I cant just go in there and bug them like I usually would, the investigators are working remotely and it's all appointments only booked months out. Where should I even start to get something like this resolved? [link] [comments] |
| Billing Issues Doctor's Office IL, USA Posted: 31 Oct 2020 06:53 AM PDT I have a child that is receiving services for a disability (speech). I'm on Medicaid, received pre-authorization for services, and the office completely dropped the ball on billing. They haven't been using the correct billing codes. Their office coordinator called me and wanted me to resolve all of this, but when I called the company that works through Medicaid I learned that as the parent/patient, I am NOT supposed to have to essentially do that coordinator's job, due to it being unethical and pretty much impossible. I've done my part re: pre-authorization, the rest is up to them. We have had weeks of services at this point that have not been billed correctly, and I had no clue at all until recently. The office coordinator told me that she had called in multiple times, and had sent in a claim, and I learned that that was a lie- there have been no calls, no nothing to Medicaid. In the meantime, I contact the director, and let the director know what's going on because at this point, I don't trust the coordinator. I don't care if she's inept or dishonest, I just don't trust her. The director proceeds to make excuses for her coordinator, that she's new and made a mistake, then says this is why doesn't normally take Medicaid cases, and that typically parents are far more helpful than I have been and that they get the information the office needs. This is all over email. I'm not really sure how the hell that's supposed to happen, when I specifically asked for which codes were needed and was informed that 1) its unethical to get a parent to ask that, and 2) the parent is not going to get an answer anyway. I let them know that until this is figured out, I'm not going to send my kid for services. The office is repeatedly telling me that I will have to pay for what Medicaid doesn't cover, but Medicaid is saying that its the responsibility of the office to bill correctly. The Doctor's Office is refusing to leave messages (they claimed in a text that they weren't sure it was my phone, when they've left messages before...also why are they texting me to say they aren't sure that its my phone? That is 100% a lie.) and at this point I'm half expecting them to terminate all services abruptly and say they no longer take Medicaid patients, which means I have to find a new doctor for speech. How do I protect myself from them coming after me for the billing? Also if they do just drop me over this, is it considered patient abandonment (not sure since my kid won't die if they don't have speech therapy, but this is extremely detrimental to them). [link] [comments] |
| Can you force a volunteer to work because of 'expectations'? Posted: 31 Oct 2020 08:30 PM PDT (TX) Hi, I think I know the answer to this, but I wanted to get some outside advice for when I get in trouble later. I'm a children's pastor's wife in a church. I almost got hired by the church as a secretary/graphic artist/assistant, but they turned me down because of my health issues. And some people have asked if that's how I felt, but no. I have Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (shout out to my fellow zebras out there) and they were concerned I wouldn't be able to keep up. From my understanding, I know that this is discrimination and that it's illegal because I messaged my support group online about it. I was so distraught about the situation when I mentioned it, but I didn't know it was a thing until they mentioned it. The sad thing is if I pursued legal action against them back then, which of course would've been nasty, my husband's (at the time fiancee) position at the church would've been compromised. It was his few months as a pastor, and that makes or breaks your career in the church. I didn't want to ruin it for him. Fast forward to now, he has a year under his belt and we're now married. I help him in the children's department because he doesn't have any support in there, and of course, I love working alongside him. But the secretary I would've worked with has caused a bit of stress with me as of late. She keeps pressuring my husband on this list of 'wifely expectations' that I'm supposed to adhere to. There's no document or anything, but she lists them off like I have to stay at the church to a certain time, and I have to participate in certain activities and do certain things as a pastor's wife. Not too big of a problem for me, except I'm a full-time student with chronic illnesses. Some are new diagnoses I'm being treated for that I have to watch out for. My husband understands this and I work where my strengths are best in the children's department so I can do the best work I can. And if I have a flare-up, he lets me sit out a service. Recently, this secretary, we'll call her Karen because she is totally one, is delegating who will serve breakfast at church. She told my husband that she put me and him down for serving breakfast that morning. My husband told her he needed to ask me first. To which she reminded him of the wive's expectations in the church. He repeated that he needed to talk to me first. So he did. I didn't mind doing it, I'm just upset I wasn't given the respect of being asked first. She didn't even message me. Sometimes I don't show up early to do things like serving breakfast because I have a flare-up, or I have to catch up on school-work. Fast forward a day or two, instead of waiting for my husband's reply she just put me down to serve breakfast and messaged everyone in the pastoral staff the list of everyone who was serving breakfast, including me. Mind you, we don't get paid extra for me helping the church. They had a chance to hire me and didn't because of my health issues. I know it sounds petty, but I know I'm upset because there's a lack of basic respect here. I don't mind helping out at a breakfast, but she didn't bother communicating with me about this. She just waved this 'list' of 'wives expectations' at my husband like she hoped he'd make me do it. I want to talk to her about it, and discuss why these things can't be my first priority because my health and my schooling are my current priority. But I'm scared that she'll wave this dumb list in my face. The reason I'm asking for legal advice is kind of theoretical. The pastor here thinks only of money (we plan on leaving) and if he sees a possible lawsuit he panics. Also, from my understanding, laws are put in place for moralistic reasons. Particularly, laws protecting volunteer workers are there so they don't get abused. If things escalate like I think they might, I would like to be equipped with the knowledge of what happens when these things are reported, and in turn, that to me can convey why these things are wrong. I don't know if that exactly makes sense, but it's the strategy I've come to. Also, if this isn't the right place for this, I apologize, newb member. I just know I need help. (EDIT) I just realized another question I'd like to ask. If I refuse, and they make things harder on my husband or me there because of it, what would happen then? I suppose that's the biggest thing I'm scared of. I realize that power is there, but if I do that, I'm worried they'll harass my husband. I know that they shouldn't have that power over us like that, but they do and I'm not sure how to combat that. It's like they could crush his dreams at the snap of a finger. [link] [comments] |
| What are my options when the dealership has lost the e-signed contract for a new car? Posted: 31 Oct 2020 07:37 AM PDT (Virginia) I took delivery of a new Tesla in Virginia. The bottom panel fell off on the highway on my way home and I had to be escorted by police back to the dealership because I couldn't take the car over 18mph. While there we noticed significant paint issues – the dealership even took photos of the damage and told me to bring it back the next day and they would take care of it. However, it took 2 weeks for them to fit me in and it has now been at their body shop repair for two weeks. Meanwhile, I get a call from their finance dept saying they have lost my e-signed loan paperwork. They sent me a new credit check form and (backdated) loan agreement asked me to resign. I don't want the car - there just have been too many issues with it, and the repainting has likely devalued the car. I told them to keep the car and return my down payment. They are insisting I resign as it is too late for a 'return' - even though it's been in their shop this whole time. Do I have to go through another credit check and sign a new loan agreement? What are my obligations and options? [link] [comments] |
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